Mark Nepo shared this great anecdote with Oprah on a recent episode of Super Soul Sunday:
I had carried around a suitcase from adolescence that said 'open in case of emergency.' Well, when the emergency came, I opened it, and there was nothing in it. So why was I going to keep carrying it around? Not only am I lighter now, but I had to start looking for the real tools that help us live.
What story/fear are you carrying around that is keeping you from living your life?
Don't worry, you're in good company: when it comes to contingency planning, I am an expert. Not only do I consider personal finance a hobby, I study grief, shame, and uncertainty...for fun. My initial interest in these subjects was largely motivated by my love of contingency planning. I aimed to map out my healing plan, to maximize my well being, and to reduce the probability of a mid-life crisis. I thought an academic approach to grief, shame, and uncertainty would appease my analytical mind and give me the best shot at accomplishing all of the above. In many ways, it did, but more importantly, it moved me in the direction of the heart.
It's easy to become distant from the heart or at least skeptical of the heart. We live in a society that celebrates rational decision making, and for whatever reason, we have come to associate the heart with irrational behavior. If you tell someone that you made a decision from your heart (especially outside of the scope of a romantic relationship), he or she may respond with genuine concern or attempt to say something supportive like do what you love. While phrases likedo what you love are well meaning, I think theycheapen heart-based decision making. Our hearts are wise. They issue challenges and urge us to step into the unfamiliar. Our hearts keep our stories interesting! We may meet these callings with a no, thank you, but regardless, the whispers offer guidance.
When I reflect on the power of the heart, I think of all of the stories that have truly moved me. Every one of them involves individuals - real or fictional - who are driven to action by their hearts. Sure, these individuals encounter disappointment and naysayers along the way, but ultimately they find a courage and an inner peace that cannot be destroyed by crisis. I know I'm not the only one who digs this story line because it sells. But it also appeals to a common experience - a longing, a drive, a desire that we have all felt at one time or another to do something that is representative of our life well-lived. That is the heart!
The heart is a tool that helps us live. It can tell us a lot about what we need and what we want to contribute. The question is will we listen?